Lucy juggles several writing projects at once, which is very inconvenient now that we all write on computers instead of pads of paper.
She has smashed many a laptop in terrible juggling accidents.
She has smashed many a laptop in terrible juggling accidents.
Title: RAGNAR AND JULIET
Genre: Sci-Fi Rom-Com
Word Count: 26K
Progress: Complete, Currently Being Subbed for Publication
Click Here for an excerpt!
Bounty hunting is usually so easy. Flash a little cleavage (oh, who are we kidding? A lot of cleavage), mix a roofie cocktail, and Juliet has her man right where she wants him: out cold, ready to be swapped for cash. Until this time.
Ragnar--space captain, alien, wise-ass-has been a bad, bad boy. Juliet needs to return him to the pissed off and charmingly psychotic king he's wronged. All seems to be going according to plan until Ragnar proves to be (1) crazy sexy, (2) crazy clever, and (3) crazy sexy (it bears repeating).
Wham, bam, boom Juliet and Ragnar end up captured by the mad monarch and in deep space-hockey. Too bad sexual chemistry doesn't unlock dungeons. Even worse, Juliet finds herself, horror of horrors, liking the nice, upstanding Ragnar and entertaining fantasies of a future with him… and his cute tail.
Can they escape and fly off into the cosmos to live happily ever after? Juliet would settle for escape plus a little nookie (oh, who are we kidding? A lot of nookie) and, maybe, a bona-fide relationship.
Genre: Sci-Fi Rom-Com
Word Count: 26K
Progress: Complete, Currently Being Subbed for Publication
Click Here for an excerpt!
Bounty hunting is usually so easy. Flash a little cleavage (oh, who are we kidding? A lot of cleavage), mix a roofie cocktail, and Juliet has her man right where she wants him: out cold, ready to be swapped for cash. Until this time.
Ragnar--space captain, alien, wise-ass-has been a bad, bad boy. Juliet needs to return him to the pissed off and charmingly psychotic king he's wronged. All seems to be going according to plan until Ragnar proves to be (1) crazy sexy, (2) crazy clever, and (3) crazy sexy (it bears repeating).
Wham, bam, boom Juliet and Ragnar end up captured by the mad monarch and in deep space-hockey. Too bad sexual chemistry doesn't unlock dungeons. Even worse, Juliet finds herself, horror of horrors, liking the nice, upstanding Ragnar and entertaining fantasies of a future with him… and his cute tail.
Can they escape and fly off into the cosmos to live happily ever after? Juliet would settle for escape plus a little nookie (oh, who are we kidding? A lot of nookie) and, maybe, a bona-fide relationship.
Title: LOVE'S BOUNTIFUL BULGE, co-written with Fellatia Langley
Genre: Romance Novel Parody
Word Count: 100K
Progress: In Edits, Intended for Agent Submission & New York Publishing
Can two imperiled peasants, Clumpetta and Kenneth, finagle their mistress (who is beautiful, except for the hemorrhoids) and master (who is a moron) onto the usurped throne of Zengland (which is like England, except with a Z) and find hot, sweaty, yet true, love?
Well, duh, this is a romance novel, sort of.
But you can't hump happily ever after if you're dead; so they must fight for their lives on aridiculous wondrous journey--battling evil crones, escaping bitey vampires, pillaging a privateer's privates, getting high with cave men, sexing up random Vikings, capturing bitchy mermaids, pampering a PMS-ing dragon, and rescuing a commune of transvestites.
Yeah, they are pretty much screwed (but not in the good way).
Genre: Romance Novel Parody
Word Count: 100K
Progress: In Edits, Intended for Agent Submission & New York Publishing
Can two imperiled peasants, Clumpetta and Kenneth, finagle their mistress (who is beautiful, except for the hemorrhoids) and master (who is a moron) onto the usurped throne of Zengland (which is like England, except with a Z) and find hot, sweaty, yet true, love?
Well, duh, this is a romance novel, sort of.
But you can't hump happily ever after if you're dead; so they must fight for their lives on a
Yeah, they are pretty much screwed (but not in the good way).
Title: SAMANTHA LYTTON AND THE DIMPLE OF DOOM
Genre: Contemporary Rom-Com
Word Count: Estimated 80K Upon Completion
Progress: 50% Written, Intended for Agent Submission & New York Publishing
Samantha Lytton had a lovely life--well, if being a secretary and a failed actress on the wrong side of thirty in Los Angeles is lovely--until The Accountant came along.
Oops, he's not an accountant, but an FBI agent.
Oh, wait, that wasn't true--he's a thief. A monstrously sexy thief adept at spinning lies like plates on sticks.
Suddenly Samantha is on the run with a dangerous dimple--a dimple attached to a con-artist of the highest order. It'll take every ounce of good luck she possesses to make it our alive and with her heart in one piece.
Too bad Samantha's well of luck ran out somewhere between the great sex and the grand larceny.
Genre: Contemporary Rom-Com
Word Count: Estimated 80K Upon Completion
Progress: 50% Written, Intended for Agent Submission & New York Publishing
Samantha Lytton had a lovely life--well, if being a secretary and a failed actress on the wrong side of thirty in Los Angeles is lovely--until The Accountant came along.
Oops, he's not an accountant, but an FBI agent.
Oh, wait, that wasn't true--he's a thief. A monstrously sexy thief adept at spinning lies like plates on sticks.
Suddenly Samantha is on the run with a dangerous dimple--a dimple attached to a con-artist of the highest order. It'll take every ounce of good luck she possesses to make it our alive and with her heart in one piece.
Too bad Samantha's well of luck ran out somewhere between the great sex and the grand larceny.
